"A room without books is like a body without a soul." - Cicero

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Mail Horror Bride by Raymond Lee

From Russia, With Love...

How do you destroy your enemy? Go for the heart, then take over the brain. 

The Z1219 virus, created by Russia's most skilled scientists, is the deadliest biological weapon in history. Harbored in the human bloodstream, it remains undetected until detonated. Once detonated, the host becomes a walking corpse with only one goal: Eat everyone. 

And now it is in America, packaged in the mail order brides the Russians shipped over to destroy us all. 

With the disease now running rampant and no cure yet discovered, it is every uninfected person for himself.
Homes are destroyed and the families inside them torn apart. Relationships can help or hurt as those left uninfected discover they are not entirely untouched by the disease. 

Follow a group of strangers as they struggle to do anything necessary to survive without losing their humanity in the process. Some will win this challenge. Most will lose.

It's a new world and the zombies aren't the only monsters. They're just the easiest to recognize in a country gone horribly wrong.


I am a huge fan of the paranormal and paranormal/supernatural books. I am not, however, that big on zombies. I haven't been able to jump on the zombie bandwagon, and I don't watch TWD. I'll watch a zombie movie once every couple of years; I really have to be in the right mood for it, and it doesn't come by often. This is the only reason why it took me so long to read and finish Mail Horror Bride. When I wasn't reading it, I was forcing myself to get into one of those zombie moods because I really really really wanted to continue the book. Even with my aversion to zombies, I was totally, 100% into this book.

Why even read it if you don't like zombies, you may be asking. Well, the author, Raymond Lee is actually a nom de plume for Crystal-Rain Love. I am a big fan of hers, I have reviewed a couple of her books on the blog in the past. Plus the premise and cover intrigued me. I decided if anyone was going to make me like zombies it would be this person. So I got myself a copy and I read it, and I am so glad I did. The book is split into two sections, the outbreak of the zombie virus and then a longer section on the survival. The book (the first in the series) follows a handful of characters through their experiences on discovering the virus and surviving it. Eventually these characters form two groups and the story jumps back and the forth between the two groups of people who are unaware of the other's existence.

What I love about this book is the reality of it, which sounds weird because the book is about a zombie apocalypse, but hear me out: The zombies aren't there because of voodoo or anything supernatural. It is a virus, generated in a lab by the Russians who then injected the virus that they can detonate themselves into a bunch of mail order brides. Those brides then came to the States and infected anyone they had sexual relations with. One the Russians pushed their big red button, the virus was activated and every mail order bride and every person that slept with them and the people that slept with those people turned into zombies. I can totally see a country trying to bring down the US a la Trojan Horse method - from within.

On top of that, the characters are some of the realest characters I have ever read. It's not a bunch of goody goody hero types, trying to survive. You've got people like Maura, a jilted ex who got dumped for a mail order bride. That lady is more than a few crayons short of a pack. Heck, the pack may be empty cept for one broken crayon. The white one. The one nobody uses. You also have Raven, a 19 year old who is on vacation with her little 9 year old sister when the outbreak happens. She's a good kid with a good heart, but just a kid, trying to protect her little sister. There's Cruz Thomas, the big action movie star who is a total Diva, all about himself...or is he? And is he as sane as he appears? The cast makes the situation a lot more real by what each character chooses to do during the exact same circumstance. Because the story jumps from character to character, most everyone's thoughts are shared at some point. You can see what they're thinking, what their motivations are, who they truly are as a person. They're all flawed, even the younger ones, and that makes this story all the more realistic in my eyes. There's black, white, and grey areas, and I absolutely love that about this book. I also love the relationships that are developed. They're not always good relationships, just because the world is full of zombies doesn't mean that everyone can put their differences aside and work together. Crazy, evil assholes will still be crazy evil assholes. But there's a few relationships in the story that I absolutely love. *ahem* Raven/Cruz and Raven/Damian

Uncensored Comments Straight From Kindle:

  • Apparently zombies sink, they don't float
  • “Then we don’t need one. We’ve already got people-eating monsters chasing us. The last thing we need is for one of us to shoot the other in the ass.” - LOL
  • Why don't zombies ever try to eat one another?
  • A few times during the first half of the book the dialogue felt a little fake at times. Maybe too much talking - zombie apocalypse, don't nobody got time for a monologue.
  • "I killed Miley Cyrus!" - ROFLMAO OMG!!!! I laughed so hard. Probably the funniest section of the book.
  • “I mean, as she died, did she … twerk?” - OMG! BAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Tears, I'm in freaking tears!
  • Would a 19 year old in 2014 know who Quincy Jones is?
  • CROSS stuff isn't my cup of tea... I had the thought towards the beginning of the book, by the end of it, I was more intrigued and kind of thought the author set things up to do a CROSS spinoff.
  • Bitch still insane!
  • Ooooh, that wasn't sketchy at all.
  • Really hope a zombie eats Maura's ass!
  •  Somebody hand me a gun, I'll shoot Maura myself!!
  • Damn straight! No need to add MORE blood to the equation. Plus you avoid the painful cramps and stuff. #TeamBirthControl
  • Ooh, is he schizo? Dammit, not knowing is KILLING me!
  • Oh shit oh shit oh shit!!! Hank is gonna kill her!
  • The movie star needs them!
  • Kill her ass!
  • Oh, this bitch hella crazy! Hope that zombie bites her in the ass! (Apparently, I really wanted Maura to get it in the ass. LOL!)
  • Oh no, I hope there isn't a kitty zombie roaming around! Oooh, maybe the kitty will be the one to bite Maura in the ass!!!
  • “I’ll swing fast and pray hard .” - Favorite line. Should be a tagline, "Swing fast and pray hard."
  • HAHAHAHAHA - Miley... *snorts*
  • I really didn't like Cruz in the beginning, but I really love him now. He's the reluctant hero. Reminds me of David Boreanaz's character on Angel.
  • ...oooh shit. Is Angela undercover bonkers?
  • Nutso!!!
  • Hilarious Twilight burn. (Won't spoil it for ya)
  • Bet you Maura's crazy ass has Daniel's head in her backpack buried in some litter. Putting money on it now.
  •  Hell yea - go Hal!
  • Ooh I hope Angela kills Maura
  • Oh my god, I need somebody, ANYBODY to take this lunatic out!
  • ...and that was your mistake, talking before killing.
  • (SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!) Ding dong the crazy bitch is dead!
  •  Oh, nice. Lighter than a head. Lol
  • LMAO - Oh Damian, how I love your comedic relief.
  • No. No no no no no. Do not kill her!!!!

What a cool roller coaster ride. I am eagerly awaiting the second part because I am hooked. The first installment ended in a cliffhanger and I need need NEED to know what the heck happens next.

Also, the award for most hated character in 2015 goes to Maura. Gawd, I don't think I have ever wanted someone to die as much as I wanted her to die. Every time she opens her mouth I pray for her demise. A zombie, one of the survivors, a dog, a tree, anything. Just kill her, plllllease!

Mail Horror Bride by Raymond Lee - GET IT!

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